Really, what does typical mean? I have come across this question so many times lately that its not even funny. Its actually somewhat bothersome. I may have aspergers and I may think a little differently than the "typical" person, but that word really isn't accurate in any stretch of the imagination. Every human being is different.
I went out to lunch with a "friend" the other day. This so called friend was an adult friend who is about twice my age. Okay, just to make her feel better, she's a little younger than that. I met her at the mall and we had lunch for the first time in months because we are so busy. When I sat down, I really started thinking about my social skills because this wasn't a peer and this person was much more accepting of my so called differences. There were a few awkward moments of silence during the lunch, but when we were talking, it felt like a real adult conversation. It wasn't childish and it wasn't with a peer. It was a really mature conversation that was in a relaxed environment. I knew more about this person than I probably should which probably helped.
On another instance that happened the other day, I had asked my mother where she thought our new cat might be when we got home from the gym. She replied by telling me that she didn't know, but I had to wash my hands before I touched any of the cats. I knew that and I was fine with that. I went to grab a clean pair of clothes/ headed over to the stairs to yell down to my mom who was in her office which resides in the basement. I wanted to ask her where Oscar our new kitten is and before she got a chance to answer, my brother who is three years younger than me, had to remind me that I needed to wash my hands before I touched the cat. My brother in any "typical" situation or family shouldn't be reminding me to do this. We're not typical though, we're different. I don't like that we're different in this way either because it makes me feel different.
When my brother isn't around, I am typically helping my mother or chilling on my computer which is fine. On the other hand it makes my brother think that somehow I never do anything to help around the house. Beside that point, my parents feel I need to practice stuff and that I am not doing stuff like my peers. At other times in my life my mother has told me that she didn't do anything until she went off to college and had to do stuff for herself. So therefore, when I was little my parents thought I was lazy, but now they think its a learning thing which makes me feel a little awkward.
I've always been one to talk about my disability quite a bit because my parents let me know about it early. I was knowledgeable. I think the first thing I knew was different about me was that I was scared of thunderstorms way longer than my friends and even my own brother. Sometimes I talk about these differences more than I should now. I think my parents have come to the conclusion that its part of me and they are knowledgeable too. It is a part of my, but its a good part of me not a bad part. Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying that my parents think about it as awful, but I think they think of it as a hurdle. I think I am getting to the point where things are being blamed on my disability. For example, the face that my family doesn't think I can remember to wash my hands before petting the cat right after they say it. Heck, my mom still congratulates me when I purchase something with my credit card alone and shows me where to sign a check. I feel like my disability is always somewhere on everyone's mind. I have said so many times lately, I am 19 guys, I know what I am doing. I'm really not sure what to think.
Now tonight, I was scrolling through facebook and I came across and autism page that asked a question about social life. They asked what we did with our social life. Many people said they have none, but I didn't. I said I am a very social and bubbly person and I just like to stay active. It doesn't matter how many friends you are as long as you are happy really. I went to therapy for pretty much all of child hood or guidance counseling in school. The things I always heard were J is being teased or J has no friends or J has no REAL friends. This didn't upset me. It was just part of my aspergers. Now that I think back, i go back to the same question. What defines typical? Everyone would always tell me that I needed to work on social skills so I would have friends. When I would complain about having no firneds, they would say oh adolescents are the hardest years for everyone. Everyone gets bullied. So then I would go back and say how could they say I have no friends and then do this to me. I mean what defines atypical then.
Typical is such an inaccurate words its just not funny and its seriously something to think about. I am who I am and that is what matters. The strength and weaknesses are what matters and everyone has those. I thought about it earlier today. There are so many strengths I have that can cover over the weaknesses.
